Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
God gave him joint rollers for hands
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
