I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Randomize
