The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize