i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
