we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
The struggles of a small town man whore
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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