just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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