Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
