I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
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