if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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