Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Randomize
