Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
