I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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