No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize