Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
