id be glad to
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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