Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
i think i just lost a toe
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