I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
