So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Randomize