Welp...herpes.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
