I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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