she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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