rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now