i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize