Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize