i just wanna soil my oats bro
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
