Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
