I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
