why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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