ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
