that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
