I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
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he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
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We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
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