we're blogging at a bar
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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