I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
