you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
he was CRYING into my vagina
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
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seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
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I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
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