The beer is more important than you right now.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
They have beer where we have blood.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
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