And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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