I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
