whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Randomize
