I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Randomize
