New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize