I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Randomize
