I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
