idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
