im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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