Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
