i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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