I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
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If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
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She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.