The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I will pee on everything he values.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.