i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize