OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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