He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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